New Book

Lately I’ve been reading St. Augustine’s confessions, and while I started reading it for, I guess not the best motives (have to for college stuff) I am actually finding it, as odd as it seems (it was written in the late 300’s) very applicable not only to my life but to today’s world. Also C.S. Lewis was somewhat inspired by Augustine so that is added interest. Anyway I think the book is very interesting and when I finish it I will write some of my thoughts, it is very cool to see how life really doesn’t change (despite what my elders say about how the world is so corrupt now, that nothing ever went wrong when they were kids) but the most amazing thing is this, Augustine wrote this book either in the late 300’s or early 400’s, the Bible was written much earlier than that and is just as applicable. I guess it shows that the word of God, and its inspirations, last.

Cool Pictures of Belize

We're Not All That Different

I don’t know about you, but when I go to Boston I only go to the following places, Fenway Park, Faneuil Hall, the Frog Pond, North End, or any nice restaurant around that area. You might say “Why are you telling me this?” My point is this, that is a very small portion of Boston, and while Boston is not a big city there is a ton more to it. I generally make an effort to stay away from the rougher parts of Boston, the outskirts of the city, places like Southie or Roxbury; I would simply avoid those places. In Belize we worked on the worst street in Belize City, it was a three gang street, and we ate lunch in the shop of a former gang leader, added to that the policemen were packing, and were receiving help from the Belizean army. But you know what, that shop owner was the nicest guy, and the kids we met were some of the sweetest kids you’ll ever meet. I had a blast coloring with them, climbing trees, playing chess, and even boxing with them. There was one little boy that followed us around, and even wanted to paint with us despite the rain. To put it simply it was an amazing experience. One thing I learned is that I can’t judge people based on where they live, this was poor and dangerous neighborhood, but that doesn’t mean all the people are bad, just because there are gangs on the street doesn’t mean everyone is involved. I used to look at the rougher parts of town as “bad neighborhoods” as I said to my group I go over here, and they go over there, but after working in Belize City my question is this, what makes them bad? Is it because they are poor; is it because of violence, does that make everyone in the place “bad”? No. I’m not advocating walking alone in a unknown and rough part of town, that’s very unwise, we were safe because DCI was known in the city, but what I am saying is that next time I won’t be so quick to judge, that the next time I’m in Boston or Philly or New York I’ll remind myself that there are kids there just like me, that we’re not all that different.

Thoughts on Loss

I’ve been thinking a lot about loss lately; loss is a tough thing to deal with and when I came back from Belize it felt like I lost a lot in my life as I have had to go through a few losses. To be honest, at first, I didn’t believe the things I heard, I thought that it was some sort of a bad dream that I would wake up and everything would be back to normal, the way it should be. Lately though I’ve realized that things are not going “back to normal” that time will just keep going on and what happened, happened. Then I became angry, not necessarily angry at God, or with my friends and family, just angry at what happened, that I wasn’t present, that I didn’t have a chance to say goodbye. Loss is tough, I wish there were an easy answer, that when we lose a pet, friend, or family member I could point to a verse and say “See here, this is what the Bible says” but unfortunately at the time I don’t know any. One thing that comes to mind is the story of Job, the man who literally lost everything, when God answers him He doesn’t give a specific answer but instead He lets Job know that He is in control. Loss is very hard to go through, but the thing is I, and everyone, must trust God and call to Him for strength to keep going. Ultimately God is in control, no matter how it seems at the time.

No Looking Back

Here is one of the many lessons I learned in Belize. First I would like to say I am sorry for not getting to this sooner but I was in Cape Cod last week and obviously could not blog. I’ve always been a bit perplexed by the story of Sodom in Gomorrah. In Genesis 19 Lot is told by an Angel to flee to the mountains because the cities will be destroyed, while leaving Lot’s wife looks back to the city and is turned into a pillar of salt. My question is this, why? I mean, why turn her into a pillar of salt for just turning around to have a look? In Belize we went to a local church and I got my answer. In my life if I want to change from the person I have become into the person God made me to be then I will have to surrender my life to him. I don’t mean a onetime promise saying “God I will never do _____ again.” I mean a full surrender from the heart, a continuous decision. The pastor said that in order to do that (because surrendering to God is a very hard thing to do) we need to keep looking forward; we need to call out to God and not let ourselves slide back. When Lot’s wife looked back she openly showed to God where her heart was, where she felt her true home was. When we look back and fall away from God into sin we show Him where our hearts are; but if we look forward and don’t let the devil push us back an inch that is where God can use us in amazing ways. Too often I’ve looked back in my own life, if there’s one thing I learned in Belize it’s this, we need to look ahead towards God and never look back or turn around

I'll Never Forget You

This post can also be found in it's original source at dutchboylife.blogspot.com.

The only thing I can really say now is that I wish I had written this sooner, but with extra time I was able to reflect and outline my thoughts clearly. While I was away in Belize, I was only gone for three days, Dutch passed away. Not to judge but to people who do not have dogs Dutch may just be a dog, but to me he was so much more. I remember when we got him and how his curious name came about, part homage to President Ronald Reagan and to Dutch chocolate; I remember how small he was yet how large his feet were. I remember him as a young dog full of energy eager to run around the house or jump up and put his paws on my shoulders. I remember him as an older dog, as a guardian, we used to rent a house in Cape Cod and he would roam at night to check up on all of us to see if we were okay. He also had the habit of if anyone were getting frustrated or angry he would run up and put his paws on your lap to calm you down. And then in his last months as his sickness worsened he would lie on the floor and put his paw on my arm just to let me know he’s there and he wants me to stay with him. Dutch knew what was going on, and he was a part of my family, we used to have a running joke that he could talk, it was common for one of us to ask “what did he say?” I really could go on and on and even then it wouldn’t do him justice, there is just too much to say to really explain him, how he loved to go on walks and rides, he loved cheese, he loved kids, how he never kissed anybody but instead pushed his nose in your ear, and how could I forget that big smile he would always have whenever I came home. I remember that he loved to come to my baseball games, there was one time when I had hit my first homer, a deep drive to right and Dutch missed it, so in my next at bat the second pitch I saw I smacked into center field, just so he could see one. To be honest I couldn’t believe he was gone, I thought he would run around the corner at the sound of my voice and fill the house with loud barks and spread hair all over the place as he wagged his tail. Even in this time of sadness though, I know God cares for him too, just as much as my family did and is taking good care of him. I loved Dutch, and even though I got cross with him and told him how much of a pain he was when he “went on strike” and rolled in the grass outside, I would give anything just to take him out one more time. As for what to do with this blog I have decided to leave it up, and I will make a collection of pictures in a slide show in his honor. Dutch was a blessing and out of all the first dogs I could have, I’m glad it was him.

Love

I saw a great movie that really made me think, it was called To Save a Life. I won’t ruin it for you but essentially it is about a boy named Jake Taylor whose childhood friend commits suicide. Jake doesn’t know how to respond initially but he eventually gets involved in a local church, builds a relationship with God, and changes his life dramatically to impact those around him. What made me think was this: we have so much influence on the people around us, everything I do or say is seen by people and processed the question is what message am I giving off? In Belize we went to a local church and the pastor asked the congregation this, when was the last time someone told you they loved you, and when was the last time you told someone you loved them? When was the last time I told somebody I loved them? Sure I love my family and friends but how often do I let the people around me know how much I really cared? Before I became a Christian I thought nobody cared, I thought my life was going nowhere and then out of the blue I get invited to church and all these people shower me with love, that’s what the Gospel is all about and that is what we should be doing to those around us. Something I realized in Belize is I don’t have to travel the world to tell people God loves them, I can do it in my hometown. I can talk to the lonely person with few friends, I can help out the teammate who is having trouble, I can tell my parents how much I appreciate everything they do. So often I write about faith but you know what, Paul writes in 1 Corinthians 13 that out of faith, love, and hope love is the most important.